Can’t Hang

I'm a Thai chef

I’m not exactly a delicate flower – I can rough a lot of conditions, and in Asia this flexibility is somewhat necessary.  But there are certain things that I can’t hang with, and I discovered Thailand’s version on nin-jennie Kryptonite.

I’m talking about the delicious cuisine of Thailand.  Jose and I decided in our effort to avoid laying about getting massages all day, we should find some educational activity to pursue during our short stay in Chiang Mai.  One that appealed to both of us was cooking class.  Thai cuisine is super tasty, super fresh, and generally super super spicy.

Our cooking class consisted of six students, including us, from all over.  We first went to a local market, where our very expert teacher offered us insight on different Thai ingredients.  We then returned to the home that was our school and proceeded to make four courses of a meal.  Jose and I made things like hot and sour soup, papaya salad, fish cakes and Chiang Mai curry.  We even learned how to make curry paste and coconut milk from scratch, which was no small feat.  Our teacher explained that these were traditional methods, but that most younger people in Thailand didn’t make these themselves at all, but rather would buy ready-made ingredients.

There was an abundance of food, and by the end of the night I was so full that I’m surprised the bed didn’t collapse out from under me.  But this is where the danger kicks in.  Thai food is regulated by the preportional amounts of ingredients added – fish sauce for sour flavor, sugar for sweet flavor, and chili peppers for spice.  If it’s too sour, add sugar.  If it’s too sweet, add fish sauce.  If it’s too spicy, too bad, it’s too late.  The average Thai person adds ten chilis to their dishes.  I added two and I felt like my tongue was melting.

In the days afterward, I discovered that I had melted my innards.  My stomach had no longer had any lining, and any effort to move caused all the liquid inside my body to slosh about and mix together in a cauldron-like concoction that made my skin turn green.  Thus I had to sleep for a good 16 hours in order to regrow all my organs.  Even now I still think they are young and delicate, but I’m regaining my former strength.  Don’t think it was just because I’m a girl either, as my hubby was subject to the same attack.  I can’t even blame the water either, because I was never sick in the food poisoning sense.  Just incapacitated.

Thus add this to my list of travel warnings.  Food in Thailand is delicious, and dangerous.  On another note, I plan on enjoying a Jennie-fied version of all my new Thai recipes.  I am now, after all, a learned Thai chef.

 

  • May

    I could use some coconut milk pronto!